verycorrectavengersquotes:

The Real Civil War

Strange, holding a broken coffee machine: Who broke it? I’m not mad. I just want to know.

Mantis: … I did it. I broke it.

Strange: No. No, you didn’t. Drax?

Drax: Don’t look at me, look at Quill.

Quill: What? I didn’t break it!

Drax: Huh, that’s weird. How’d you even know it was broken?

Quill: Because it’s sitting right in front of us and it’s broken!

Drax: Suspicious.

Quill: No, it’s not!

Thor: If it matters, Stark’s son was the last one to use it.

Peter: What?! I don’t even drink that crap!

Thor: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart?

Peter: I was gathering sugar packets for Mr. Stark‘s morning latte!

Mantis: Let’s not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it.

Strange: No. Who broke it?

Gamora: … Rocket‘s been awfully quiet.

Rocket: Really?

Gamora: Yeah!

(everyone’s yelling ensues)

*later*

Strange: I broke it. It burned my hand so I punched it. I predict ten minutes from now they’ll be at each other’s throats with war paint on their faces and a pig head on a stick. Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.

(via laureprime)